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Sir J-Werk
01-10-08, 10:53 pm
We have been getting some crazy ass weather here in Northwest Missouri in the last couple of months. Ice storms, snow storms, etc.... Nothing that we haven't been through before but just more than most have been use to in a while. It's been a pretty hectic start to the winter season, no doubt about it.

I have been a security officer at a state forensic hospital for a little over two years now. There is a walkway, a path if you will, that leads from the main building that I work in that takes you down to 6 cottages and then loops back around and comes right back to the main building. I just received a phone call about 45 minutes ago from the nurse manager telling me that the walkway has ice on it and that she almost fell coming back up to the building.

I'm thinking to myself at that point, "Jesus Christ! I just walked down there an hour ago and there was nothing. It was clear!"

Now, in all honestly, common sense does not run rampant in this place and there have been many an employee cry "WOLF" over a patch of ice that if you take just one step in either direction you can avoid it completely. But nonetheless I grabbed my coat and a bag of rock salt and headed down the path. Sure enough, reflecting against the glow of the light poles were scattered patches of ice that had flowed over the walkway. And as I walked from ice patch to ice patch I realized how much this relected my own Journey.

I've slipped.... Didn't even see it coming either. When I started this Journey a year ago I could tell you where I was headed and I could show the direction I was going. Absolutely nothing was going to stop me, nothing. I had a clear vision, a clear path.... And then the weather changed. Not in a literal way as in accumulation of rain or ice or snow but in an inward, personal way.

I started comparing my accomplishments to that of others, comparing what others could do and what I could not. Doubt precipitated complacency and soon a patch of ice covered the path and I found myself flat on my ass. All because I got too fucking careless looking around and not paying attention to what was infront of me.

So I have gone back; gone back over a years worth of thoughts and found some things that I have posted to help keep my head focused in the right direction, to help keep my path clear when the bad weather comes. And perhap maybe if someone else comes along behind me on the same path and feels themselves starting to slip that they can reach into this bag and find the salt they need.

Sir J-Werk
01-10-08, 10:55 pm
This Commitment; this Lifestyle; this Animal; this Journey is a path I have chosen to tread, albeit, the path is still shadowed in my site. I have read through countless threads and posts; routines, motivations, frustrations, triumphs, thoughts, and philosophies, to perhaps gain clairvoyance into the minds of this Brotherhood and attempt to understand just an enth of what this Journey is about. I know full well that I must fabricate from the undeveloped Iron in my mind a template; a template of Animal.

"To get to it, you'd need to cut away all the layers of doubt and distraction till knife hits the bone.... Find that itch.... Scratch till there's nothing there." - Wrath; Week 13, "The Journey"

The Journey is singular physically; one Man, one Focus, one Animal; to become "The One."

Mentally, the Journey is multifold. It is not only the colossal weight of Iron hoisted upon broad shoulders but the deafening weight of those who would Deny, Disbelieve, Depreciate, Disparage, and ultimately, Dread the Journey.

"This lifestyle of ours provides shelter from the storm.... Life can fucking beat the living shit out of you if you let it. But no matter what shit sandwich you get served, it is no doubt a blessing to have the structure and the comfort of routine that bodybuilding provides." - G. Diesel; Entry #3, "Diary of a Madman."

A cold steel bar now finds life in the grip of my fists, not the empty grip of a pistol. Tendons and joints, now the hammer, cocked and ready to fire. Muscle becomes the trigger in which I fire, BOOM! One rep, BOOM! Two reps, BOOM! Three reps, BOOM!; until I, the clip, am empty. I will not be wasted with one shot; I will reload.

My reflection is not distorted or muddied up above the flowing currents of the Missouri River. It is crystal clear, looking straight back at me as I stand ready in the Cage. I do not fear the plunge, although the weight on my shoulders is great, because I now defy gravity; I will return to the surface. I inhale; plunge, one rep; after plunge, two reps; after plunge, three reps; plunge, until I am baptized in my own sweat, the rapids in my legs at full force. Now I am the bridge standing strong and tall over raging waters.

Because of the inspirational words of a few, and the unwavering support of the thousands of the Men and Women of Animalpak.com, I can say with Pride; I am Alive, I am Honored, I am Animal.

.... This is my Journey.

Sir J-Werk
01-10-08, 10:56 pm
-Tuesday, January 30, 2007, 20:00hrs....

"It's fucking cold outside; I'm at work. I have worked here for over a year now and never once have I stepped foot inside of this weight room. Irony; I am responsible for the security of the entire institution, along with its staff and patients. I know my radio works; I can call for back up; beyond that... I'm fucked."

Those were my thoughts that night. Those were my thoughts a lot of nights. Hell, most of my nights were nothing but thoughts.... See a pattern? I had just lived through the longest year of my life. The fucked up thing is that I'm not really sure how exactly I did live through it.... I shouldn't be here.

A failed three year relationship had led to weight loss, pills, drinking, a river, and a gun. To answer your question, no; I wasn't losing weight for the ladies, I wasn't taking vitamins, I wasn't quenching my thirst with Gatorade, I wasn't fishing for the big cats in the Missouri, and I wasn't hunting game in the timber. I had gone from 200lbs to 140lbs in a month and a half. I became heavily addicted to narcotics such as Ativan and Klonopin. Don't forget the sleeping pills either.... I don't know how many nights I lost zoning out to the blue screen of my television thanks to Trazadone. I always made sure that I had plenty of beer to take them with as well.

At my lowest of lows I ventured to a bridge that passes west into Kansas over the Missouri river. I stared deep down below me into the freezing water; but honestly I couldn't see a fucking thing through the night and the tears. I stood on the edge for what seemed a lifetime. But something kept me from letting loose of the rail. I think now that it was the thought of my family. I don't recall how, but I made it home that night. A few weeks later, once again in a drugged, drunken, self-pity, rage I managed to get a hold of a 9mm pistol. Yes, I pulled the trigger; yes, it was loaded; yes, the safety was off; no, the second safety was not off.... That night the pills went down the toilet, the beer went down the sink. The gun was sold the next morning. The good news; I still had my job at the state mental hospital.... Irony.

So there I was, sitting in a ~7x20ft room with three universal weight machines, clad only in my official security officer, polyester, uniform about to lift for the first time in almost 4 years. How did it go? I'll let the numbers do the story telling from here.

Bench: 75 3sets/10reps
Incline: 45 3sets/10reps
Shoulder press: 45 3sets/10reps
Curls: 50 3sets/10reps
Tricep extensions: 40 3sets/10reps
Seated leg curls: 95 3sets/10reps
Seated leg extensions: 65 3sets/10reps

.... Needless to say I had a long ways to go.

Sir J-Werk
01-10-08, 10:58 pm
Monday, April 2, 2007; 21:00 @ The Gym / Workout #2; Animal Training Routine #1.... My Way.

I have to tell you, Brothers and Sisters, about something that happened before I left for the gym tonight; about something that you may not understand; about something that hasn't happened in a long time.

I had received my first Animal Pak sample, Pump, in the mail today. Seems harmless enough; fuck, I was excited to spare the very least of emotions and decided to keep it tucked away until tonight’s workout. Therefore, fast forward to 10pm and I arrive in my driveway a few minutes later. I get changed and while in the process pull out a little black package from a padded envelope; time to see what's inside of this thing. I tear open the pak and into my hand falls a palm full of pills.... Time utterly stops.

Perhaps at this moment you would tell yourself, "Let's fucking do this! Take that shit! Time to get insane!" You'd be a fucking liar if you told me, "No." Because what you see in your eyes is Animal Pump and everything that you have ever read about, talked about, heard about.... What I saw was a handful of pills. What I saw was addiction, doubt, fear, and hopelessness. What I saw was 20-to-30 little white round pills of Ativan (that's a narcotic to you) in my hand at once. What I felt was my fucking guts twisting, lungs choking, my mind swirling, sweat running, joints cramping, legs quaking. I felt death's icy, razor sharp blade moving slowing up my spine and his breath on my neck.... I couldn't move.

I stared into the palm of my hand for what seemed an eternity, completely numb. "How in the fuck am I going to do this?" was the only coherent thought I could muster.... One at a time. I dumped all the pills back into the pak then taking one out at a time began to take them; one, by one, by one, until they were all gone.... I can't even tell you know how many there were; it didn't matter. They were gone.

I went to war tonight, at the gym, with a year of my life that is now over; that I can never get back. I went to war with my Soul, my Heart, and Myself... and I beat the fuck out of it with every rep; bled it out with every bit of sweat; exhaled it with every breath. I would have satisfaction.

.... In the end, my guts were spilled; my lungs, winded; my mind, clear; sweat, pouring; joints, sore; legs, quivering.... At 1am, through the windows of my Mountaineer I welcomed life into my very marrow and embraced the comfort of 73 degree night air against my skin. And into my ears danced the dark and haunting sounds of Morphine as they sang, "Cure for Pain."

... I took my time going home.

Stay Strong, stay Focused, stay Animal!

Respect.

Sir J-Werk
01-10-08, 10:59 pm
Going to the bathroom after days like that are risky and probably safer in you have a spotter.... Think about it; it's the day after lag day, you just finished arms... going to the toilet... attempt to sit down... legs buckle and give out... you fall forward and attempt to break your fall with your hands... you have nothing left in your arms... you have now broken your face... on top of that, you now must peel not only your face but your body off the floor.... It's a catastrophe waiting to happen every time! ;)

Stay Strong, stay Focused, stay Animal!

Respect.

Sir J-Werk
01-10-08, 11:00 pm
Below is something that I posted on another thread yesterday. Now, normally I would not do this but the more I re-read what I had put the more I realized how much it had to do with my own journey and my past. I hope no one is led to believe that I am reposting this for narcissistic reasons.... It just took 24 hours to hit home....

Go stand in front of a mirror.... Close your eyes.... let those voices bounce from one side of your head to another; let those thoughts rewind back to the good times.... let them knot your stomach with the bad times....

You feel that hate, that anger, that lump in your throat swelling up? That's Pride; it's a hard mother fucker to swallow. You feel your legs shaking, your fist clinching, your lip quivering? That's Pain; you are going feel it. You feel your heart pump harder, your lungs getting tighter? That's Life; it's fucking real and it's now....

You think you can handle that shit? Go ahead; keep your eyes closed.... Let those demons in the dark fuck with you, and fuck with you, and fuck with you.... Let those devils dance all they want; let them haunt mile after mile of your memories.... Guess what….

While all that shit is slicing through your brain like a razor blade, you haven't moved one inch. You're standing in one place with your fucking eyes closed....

Open your eyes.... Feel that light hit you; see those eyes staring back at you? This is Focus; This is the Journey. One Man, One Focus; to become, The One....

Now, start with your feet and Move.

Stay Strong, stay Focused, stay Animal!

Respect.

Sir J-Werk
01-10-08, 11:01 pm
A little story from last week.... I was finishing up Pec Dec's and Chris was on the treadmill doing his cardio like a good boy.... On Sundays the local Rock station plays a rerun of The House of Hair with Dee Snyder.... I want you all to know how fucking difficult it is to do pec dec while laughing your ass off... Why? When you look in the mirror and behind you, you see your partner jamming out to "Turbo Lover" by Judas Priest on the treadmill, head banging and air guitar in full effect.... Well, you'd snot too! ;)

Sir J-Werk
01-10-08, 11:02 pm
So I realize that I don't write much on my journey as I use to nor come up with off the wall comments or words, like everyone’s favorite, "fuckwhistle." Oh hell, I'm just a regular guy... Sometimes I have a wild hair and sometimes I'm might muster up three words every two hours. It's just who I am.

But I thought I would take a minute just to sum up this week. It was a good week. I have had my ups and downs like anyone. I feel that I have made awesome progress in areas and at the same time taken a few steps backwards in others.... Always looking for balance in this crazy game.

Managed to rip out the crotch of both pairs of uniform pants thirty minutes before I had to be at work.... As if that wasn't bad enough, when I went to put on a pair of my own pants I ripped the crotch out in those too.... Apparently my legs are growing more then what I give them credit for!

Chris, my training partner, and I have our own contest going. We are going to see who pops that first vascular vein.... Although I think he is slightly ahead of me 'cause he had a few squigglies pop while doing over head db ext today.... he's a freak.

So anyway, it's 8pm here in my own little hamlet of the world, two more hours of work left.... how am I going to kill the time? Simple, I received Animal Chest and Animal Delts in the mail today and plan on taking full advantage of the employee conference room and its TV and DVD player. ;)

Stay Strong, stay Focused, stay Animal!

Respect.

Sir J-Werk
01-10-08, 11:02 pm
Spottin' squatters in the dark.... That little saying came out of a candid PMing conversation with Nightshift a few weeks ago and at the time I am sure had some perverted undertone to it.... Imagine that.... But for some reason it stuck in my head and took on a different meaning....

I guess when times get shitty and dark we can ball up on the floor and do nothing.... Or we can stand our ground, on our own two feet, then when our eyes have focused, step forward. Sure, we are going to trip up and fall down. Maybe bump into something we didn't know was there.... But deal with what presents itself in front of us and move on.... The shit behind us, it's still in the dark, let it be.... There's a reason it's still there.

I realize that this isn't anything profound or that hasn't been said before.... But it's a perspective that I understand the best in my life right now.... I could squat down in the dark with the rest of the sheep of this world and hide from the wolves roaming around out there or I face those mother fuckers and show them who the Alpha is; who is the true Animal.

Stay Strong, stay Focused, stay Animal!

Respect.

Sir J-Werk
01-10-08, 11:03 pm
People in this life will set you up for disappointment with their bullshit. Most of them are already disappointments in flesh form waiting to shake your hand, orchestrate their forked tongue, and hand out fancy pale nimbus white business cards with the raised lettering.... Spineless wastes. The more I put myself back out into this fucked up world the more I see the writing on the wall. If I give you the time of day; if I express just the tiniest bit of fucking interest do me a favor.... Don't prop me up in the tits and dicks box on your bullshit MySpace page. Be a fucking human being.... All I'm saying is fucking call me back!

Sir J-Werk
01-10-08, 11:03 pm
.... "I'm sorry." .... Sorry for what? I am so fucking tired of hearing that pussy shit. What really fucking eats me is when I think about how many times I have said that shit to save face.... Save what?! It didn't save a mother fucking thing! Here, you try it.... ready? 1, 2, 3, "I'm sorry." .... Feel any better about yourself, your fucked situation? Of course not.... Get drunk, say stupid shit; "I'm sorry." Cheat on your spouse; "I'm sorry." Steal the cookie from the mother fucking cookie jar; "I'm sorry." .... Bullshit! You drank the shit, you said the shit, you fucked the shit, and you sure the hell put your hand in the shit!

Why don't you do something that requires some fucking effort on your part? When you get caught fucking up and you know it, instead of tucking your tail between your legs like a whipped dog and crying, "I'm sorry," try this ... "I did it... I can't change it... Never again." .... AND FUCKING STAND ON IT! .... Jesus....

Sir J-Werk
01-10-08, 11:04 pm
Here's an old debate but with a different twist.... You're starring at a squat rack, the bar is loaded; I'll let you envision just how loaded it is.... So, what do you see? Do you see it for what it's worth; just weight. Do you see it as light and weak; Are you the whip? Do you respect it? ... Does it respect you? ... Or will it crush you because you display hubris just because you may have dealt with something similar to it before?

Now take that vision of the loaded squat rack and in its place.... a human being.... Man, woman, or child.... Ask yourself the same questions....

Sir J-Werk
01-10-08, 11:05 pm
I've made some mistakes in my life. Some worse than others, sure, but they were ignorant on my part....

Two if the most resounding lessons that are still hanging over my head is this; Money doesn't buy shit and lying doesn't hide weakness.... Learnin' the hard way.

I've been living in the basement of my parent's house for a little over a year and a half now because I thought money could save a three year relationship that was on the outs. Credit cards, shiny shit, make it go faster, light it up brighter, play it louder, new, newer, newest.... In the end when I cashed in the receipt read, "I can't be with you. It's over." .... Cut.

Would have never had to go that route if I had been an honest man. I was spitting out so many lies to so many people I think I was even lying to myself at times and believing it. On the outside I was stone cold, numb. Inside I had a weak heart and weak soul.... Lying was my brick wall.... Problem is one person finds the crack, others start chipping away and the shit comes down on top of you quick.... Scrape.

I've earned my bed and I lay in it every night.

I've read a lot of how the Iron has changed people and their perspectives of their own lives.... And it is so fucking true.

Money isn't going to buy my sweat and screams and pain provided free of charge while I'm under the weights.... And it will never lie to me.... It will always remind me how weak I am and how much work I have to do.... Comfort.

Sir J-Werk
01-10-08, 11:05 pm
Well, so far this little split that I've come across is working really good! Nothing fancy at all, just a lot of the basics. It has been challenging because it's been months since I have gone for reps. I've surprised myself a few times already this week.... I'm not even tripping over the fact that I have to take the weight down a notch to accomplish my w/o goals.... I know that at the end of the day that I am stronger and that is always a good feeling.

So despite all the bullshit that has been going on around me it's good to know that one thing is remaining constant.... The Iron.

Sir J-Werk
01-10-08, 11:06 pm
....Crazy to think that the mind never does a single rep; but can bare tremendous weight and can crush you at the same time....

GriT-
01-11-08, 3:40 pm
Great journey. And I couldn't agree more, one of my biggest peeves is people and "I'm sorry"

*subscribed*

LeeMc
01-11-08, 4:54 pm
Sub'd aswell. Very interesting. Keepcoming with the thoughts bro, I like.

Gehlbach!
01-11-08, 5:26 pm
Great words Sir J!!

Sir J-Werk
01-11-08, 5:43 pm
Great journey. And I couldn't agree more, one of my biggest peeves is people and "I'm sorry"

*subscribed*


Sub'd aswell. Very interesting. Keepcoming with the thoughts bro, I like.


Great words Sir J!!

Thanks Brothers.... My hope is that whatever ends up in here will serve to help any of the Brothers and Sister of the Legion if they every feel like they are losing a step. I know I struggle with that at times and need a little reminder why I started this all in the first place.

Sir J-Werk
01-28-08, 11:05 pm
Why am I doing this? I’ve never thought about it….

I look at pictures guys like The House and Ox, guys that are the same age as me, and think, “I’m doing the same thing they are doing.” I’ve seen pictures of Brian Weston, Powerfreak, and there is always a piercing intensity in his eyes even when he’s not squatting or pulling…. Always intensity….

But unlike me, they have already put in their time years ahead. To me they are almost larger than life to my eyes…. But the reality is that they are just like me. They have families, jobs, bills, and roofs over their heads too. The vehicles they get around in don’t have any more or less wheels or doors than mine. The food they eat doesn’t fall out of the sky on golden platters. It comes from the super market…. The same place I buy my food. And the weights they lift don’t read “Pros only.” They are the same as I lift…. They still put their pants on one leg at a time.

For all these similarities though I do not share their same visions. I’m never going to be on stage posing or on a platform lifting…. And I know this and I am okay with this. So, why the fuck am I doing this? Why am I eating six meals a day? Why did I spend all the money I did on supplements? Why am I willing to choke down all that stuff? I have never shit and pissed so much in my entire life then I have in the past week and a half! Fuck, that becomes a workout in and of itself! Hell, I couldn't even enjoy a day out with my girl this past weekend without looking for the john every 15 minutes.... But still I am willing to put myself through it…. Why?

I could say it’s because I am making up for the past…. But what kind of bull shit ideology is that? How can I have focus, a vision, a plan, if I am looking behind me? Trust me I have no desire to relive the high school football dream. My coach was a prime example of how to live stuck in the past and would share the same damn stories every God forsaken year…. A role model he was not.

Still, that magic word, “why?”

I was lurking through a particular thread and post by Tiny. Here’s the quote, “’When my daughter was a newborn and she would cry in her crib at night, I would get right up and go to her - usually end up lying back down and holding her on my chest until she fell asleep. Her mother would say to me, "Jimmy, you're going to spoil that child - leave her lay there; she'll stop crying on her own." I told her there would never be a day where I'd leave my daughter to cry alone in the dark.’”

And that’s when I knew why…. The day that I can be larger than life itself by holding my child in my arms, safe from all that is out in this world…. But have a little insurance to back it up.

Lowdown5
01-28-08, 11:09 pm
How did I miss this? Subbed Bro.

Sir J-Werk
01-28-08, 11:11 pm
How did I miss this? Subbed Bro.

Haha, it's all good John. I don't write very often since at times it seems almost processed out.... but there are times when a mood strikes me and I put a thought or two together. Thanks for stoppin' by Brother.

Lowdown5
01-28-08, 11:13 pm
Haha, it's all good John. I don't write very often since at times it seems almost processed out.... but there are times when a mood strikes me and I put a thought or two together. Thanks for stoppin' by Brother.



What you wrote struck a chord with me Bro, it is good stuff.

Sir J-Werk
01-28-08, 11:33 pm
What you wrote struck a chord with me Bro, it is good stuff.

Thanks John.

Northman
01-28-08, 11:44 pm
What you wrote struck a chord with me Bro, it is good stuff.

Same here. I don't usually subscribe to threads that don't involve actual lifting, but I am making an exception in this case.

Sir J-Werk
01-29-08, 2:03 pm
Same here. I don't usually subscribe to threads that don't involve actual lifting, but I am making an exception in this case.

Then I hope to not disappoint. Thank you Brother.

Brute
01-29-08, 2:22 pm
Count me in and keep it up.

Hollow
01-29-08, 2:25 pm
How did I miss this? Subbed Bro.

X2! Excellent and meaningful writings Sir J-Werk.

Cellerator65
01-29-08, 4:06 pm
why do we do what we do?

i think about that question everyday and i come up with the same answer. Theres something about the pain, the struggle, the terrible-tasting food, the 8-9 hours of sleep, the no drinking/smoking, the sweat, the blood, the puking, the injuries, the anger, the determination... that makes me feel alive. Could i live everyday as a slave to society like everyone else i see? fuck no. I'm not looking for instant gratification, for the "wow you look great" response, i know in the end there will be my reward. I will strive to dominate my mind, my body, my soul. I want my child to see what having the soul of a gladiator and heart of a lion is first hand.

Ricky P
01-29-08, 4:29 pm
MY MAN! What's up brother? I actually remember a couple of those entries from your previous journey last year. One year later, look at you now.. Gotta feel good. I've been on hiatus the last couple months but it's good to be back and even better to see you're still going strong. I'll be following along, looking forward to it!

Sir J-Werk
01-31-08, 3:15 am
Count me in and keep it up.

Will do Brother; You can count on it.


X2! Excellent and meaningful writings Sir J-Werk.

Appreciate it. Thank you Brother.


why do we do what we do?

i think about that question everyday and i come up with the same answer. Theres something about the pain, the struggle, the terrible-tasting food, the 8-9 hours of sleep, the no drinking/smoking, the sweat, the blood, the puking, the injuries, the anger, the determination... that makes me feel alive. Could i live everyday as a slave to society like everyone else i see? fuck no. I'm not looking for instant gratification, for the "wow you look great" response, i know in the end there will be my reward. I will strive to dominate my mind, my body, my soul. I want my child to see what having the soul of a gladiator and heart of a lion is first hand.

Couldn't have said it better myself Brother. You hit it right on the head.


MY MAN! What's up brother? I actually remember a couple of those entries from your previous journey last year. One year later, look at you now.. Gotta feel good. I've been on hiatus the last couple months but it's good to be back and even better to see you're still going strong. I'll be following along, looking forward to it!

Ricky my Brother! Yeah, it was what the doc ordered; I needed to go back over all of it to get a little something fired up in me that I had lost somehow but you can bet the house that it's back and goin' strong!

Themostocles
01-31-08, 3:32 am
Subbed. Alot of connections and parallels to the experiences of my life. Keep writing. -T.

Sir J-Werk
02-14-08, 4:28 am
This is my gym. What you see is what you get. There isn't a fancy fucking thing about it and the only reason it looks bright an cheerful is because I had the flash on.... But this is my invitation to the Brotherhood.... I want to see some other Animals up in this Beast.

http://i36.photobucket.com/albums/e17/workitworkman/P2140008.jpg
http://i36.photobucket.com/albums/e17/workitworkman/P2140009.jpg
http://i36.photobucket.com/albums/e17/workitworkman/P2140010.jpg
http://i36.photobucket.com/albums/e17/workitworkman/P2140011.jpg
http://i36.photobucket.com/albums/e17/workitworkman/P2140012.jpg
http://i36.photobucket.com/albums/e17/workitworkman/P2140013.jpg
http://i36.photobucket.com/albums/e17/workitworkman/P2140014.jpg
http://i36.photobucket.com/albums/e17/workitworkman/P2140016.jpg
http://i36.photobucket.com/albums/e17/workitworkman/P2140017.jpg

Now, who wants to train?

P.S. I have no fucking clue why there is a candy machine by the home made Smitty....

Sir J-Werk
02-19-08, 3:19 pm
I was never big on the idea of taking pictures of myself.... But curiosity got the best of me this morning.

Its been over a year since I first went into the weight room at work and started messin' around.... Come April it will be a year since I stepped foot into the Gym and started down this Journey. Talk about experimental....

I'll be the first to tell you that it's only been in the last month and a half that everything is just starting to make sense. I will be the first to tell you that I still don't eat as clean, or perhaps as much as I need to. But you can bet your ass I am up makin' me some breakfast in the morning rather than not, like I use to. You can bet that I'm making sure to take plenty of food and protein shakes with me to work so by the time I hit the gym I have some shit to burn out. You can bet that I am taking advantage of suppliments now that I use to shy away from because I was thought I couldn't afford them; because I didn't know about online ordering.

There was a shit ton that I didn't KNOW through that first year. And I have had some great help from many of YOU right here on this Forvm. Now that the REAL foundations have been laid and I've cast off all the bullshit excuses that I ever allowed myself to manifest perhaps the real growing can finally begin....

So here you go. The first pic you see if the very first I took on April 3, 2007. The second if just an hour or two old now.... Don't worry; I'll be bigger tomorrow.

http://i36.photobucket.com/albums/e17/workitworkman/Progress1.jpg
http://i36.photobucket.com/albums/e17/workitworkman/P2190008.jpg

Northman
02-19-08, 3:23 pm
Hold onto those pics so you can see the changes in another year. Nothing is as motivating. Keep it up.

Sir J-Werk
02-19-08, 5:17 pm
Hold onto those pics so you can see the changes in another year. Nothing is as motivating. Keep it up.

It's somethin' alright.... I think it honest to say that this first year was a warm up year.... Like I said, there was so much that I didn't know. I remember the first night I went into the gym with some friends that already had passes and I recall just standing there wonder what the fuck to do.

Are there some things I wish I had done differently; of course. Would it have affected my progress; sure. I half assed some things.... Mostly involving food which is one of the most ignorant things I could have done but to understand that you have to understand that I still have to walk a very tight rope when it comes to my expenses and where all my Washingtons' are placed. I know that I am not the first to say that and will not be the last but my situation is not the norm by any means.... but I won't get into that here.

In some ways this is a good reality check. I have seen the progress of others that have made greater gains than I in the same, and even less, amount of time. I let that stuff get to me every once in a while and sometimes it was fire but for the most part it was smoke. Once I finally got it through my thick fucking head that those things don't matter I had a much clearer focus and mind set.

Since then I have found ways to eat as much and as best I am able. I have found ways to save back a few nickle and dimes to stack some suppliments without breaking my bank. And also I have remained much more constistant with what I have been doing in the gym.... Although the time has come to switch that up and take on a new challenge.

I've finally figured out how to "do."

Northman
02-19-08, 5:21 pm
Most excellent. If I can be of any help along your journey, you know who to call upon.

Sir J-Werk
02-19-08, 5:26 pm
Most excellent. If I can be of any help along your journey, you know who to call upon.

Thank you Brother. I greatly appreciate it.

Hollow
02-19-08, 8:11 pm
Hold onto those pics so you can see the changes in another year. Nothing is as motivating. Keep it up.

X2!

Since then I have found ways to eat as much and as best I am able. I have found ways to save back a few nickle and dimes to stack some suppliments without breaking my bank. And also I have remained much more constistant with what I have been doing in the gym.... Although the time has come to switch that up and take on a new challenge.

I've finally figured out how to "do."

With your knowledge that you possess now, the second year's progress is going to be amazing!

Sir J-Werk
02-19-08, 8:25 pm
With your knowledge that you possess now, the second year's progress is going to be amazing!

That's what I am shooting for. If I can keep myself disciplined in ALL phases of my life then things should go very well.... It is something that I have always struggled with. Every now and then I let things slip because I get complacent but even now I can see that part of me is beginning to change little by little.

The dedication and discipline that people talk about here goes far beyond eating, supps, and lifting.... I was narrow minded when I started and thought those things only pertained to "the routine." But now that I understand the changes that it has created in me as a person, my respect and admiration for everyone here that believe in what they are doing continues to grow the more I subject myself to this walk of life.

Themostocles
02-20-08, 12:41 am
Just looking at thise pics you can tell how much you have grown, in body and mind. Like one of the articles said, its like putting change in a jar. You may only have a dollar or two now, next week it maybe five. Keep it up J. -T.

Sir J-Werk
02-20-08, 3:53 am
Just looking at thise pics you can tell how much you have grown, in body and mind. Like one of the articles said, its like putting change in a jar. You may only have a dollar or two now, next week it maybe five. Keep it up J. -T.

Thanks Brother. I appreciate it kindly.... Got 50 cents I can borrow? ;)

under7he13lood
02-22-08, 12:07 am
I was never big on the idea of taking pictures of myself.... But curiosity got the best of me this morning.

Its been over a year since I first went into the weight room at work and started messin' around.... Come April it will be a year since I stepped foot into the Gym and started down this Journey. Talk about experimental....

I'll be the first to tell you that it's only been in the last month and a half that everything is just starting to make sense. I will be the first to tell you that I still don't eat as clean, or perhaps as much as I need to. But you can bet your ass I am up makin' me some breakfast in the morning rather than not, like I use to. You can bet that I'm making sure to take plenty of food and protein shakes with me to work so by the time I hit the gym I have some shit to burn out. You can bet that I am taking advantage of suppliments now that I use to shy away from because I was thought I couldn't afford them; because I didn't know about online ordering.

There was a shit ton that I didn't KNOW through that first year. And I have had some great help from many of YOU right here on this Forvm. Now that the REAL foundations have been laid and I've cast off all the bullshit excuses that I ever allowed myself to manifest perhaps the real growing can finally begin....

So here you go. The first pic you see if the very first I took on April 3, 2007. The second if just an hour or two old now.... Don't worry; I'll be bigger tomorrow.

http://i36.photobucket.com/albums/e17/workitworkman/Progress1.jpg
http://i36.photobucket.com/albums/e17/workitworkman/P2190008.jpg

I read through just about every post entirely. Way to overcome, you've gone through so much and have definately come out on top of the situation. Nicely done.

I like how you put that you didn't know a lot through your first year, and look where you're at now. Just think what you will know in another year.

Looking forward to training.
God Bless
-Sam

Maharg
02-22-08, 12:30 am
Thanks Brother. I appreciate it kindly.... Got 50 cents I can borrow? ;)

No, but i might have a quarter you can have.

Themostocles
02-22-08, 1:03 am
I migh got some change for you, but your going to have to earn it... lol. -T.

Sir J-Werk
02-22-08, 4:25 pm
I read through just about every post entirely. Way to overcome, you've gone through so much and have definately come out on top of the situation. Nicely done.

I like how you put that you didn't know a lot through your first year, and look where you're at now. Just think what you will know in another year.

Looking forward to training.
God Bless
-Sam

Thank you Brother.... Yes, what a difference one year can make.... Physically AND mentally! Now all I have to do is continue learning and applying everything that has been and will be laid out infront of me.


No, but i might have a quarter you can have.

Sweet! haha!


I migh got some change for you, but your going to have to earn it... lol. -T.

Mandang.... LOL!

Sir J-Werk
03-17-08, 6:44 pm
Money... it's a real bitch. You can't have enough and never have it either.... It's been the root of a lot of my evils.

I use to be a pretty jaded fucker with rose colored glasses. No matter what was going on I didn't think of what it was costing me and I guarantee you I could always find someone to fit the bill when times got tight. Do you think I really cared? No. Sure, I'd hit'em back with, "I'll cover you next time," but never held on my word. I was out for mine and I found ways, or people, to get it. Not exactly the "good" guy everyone made me out to be.... That's another story.

I haven't been shy these days about the fact that I live in the lower level of my parents house. I've been home for a little over two years now.... I think. Go back that far and things start to get fuzzy with drugs, alcohol, and fucked up relationships.... So my memory is a bit weak.

It was mom and dad that told me to come home. At the time I had hit the bottom of the barrell and I knew it.... I just had some issues with accepting it. The only thing besides my relationship with my fiance' that was shattered was my wallet and it wasn't until I sat down with my parents that I discovered how FUBAR everything had become. I had been writing checks my ass couldn't pay and every dime I thought I had to my name I could feel slipping through my fingers.... I forgot what it was like to sleep at night.

After a lot of head scratching and pencil pushing my folks and I finally got my shit in check. How many parents do you know would take out a loan against their house to the tune of almost $30G's and still look you in the eye and tell it's there job as a parent to help their kid; that they do it because they love you? .... Don't get me wrong, it wasn't just "that easy." There were plenty of talks to the tune of, "You slip up just this much....."

Things these days are a lot less stressful than they use to be. It's still a tough pill to swallow when 3/4's of my paychecks are devoured by my parents loan and a car payment that has so much negative equity rolled up in it that for what I'm paying now I could easily be make two car payments with some left over if that gives you any ideas.... Once again, another story. But it is getting better.

It's still hard however trying to convince people who believe that just because I live with my parents that I have the abilty to do whatever I want.... That couldn't be further from the truth. I still have a lot of dues to pay and my parents sure as hell aren't giving out any allowances for being good. They are busy busting their ass trying to make ends meet and put my sister through college.... I would be a shitty mother fucker to ask them for one thin dime after all they've done for me.

I know what people see.... But it ain't what it looks like.

Themostocles
03-17-08, 7:35 pm
From soneone else in shoes like yours,,, When your at your parents, the last thing you have is money, if you are worth anything as a human being. You are usually getting your shit together and taking care of business. Fun is a luxury rarely had. My money is tight enough air can barely squeeze through, everything is budgeted, especialy fun. Do the right things and pay your parents back, and you are one hell of a man, and a animal. -T.

Sir J-Werk
03-17-08, 8:22 pm
From soneone else in shoes like yours,,, When your at your parents, the last thing you have is money, if you are worth anything as a human being. You are usually getting your shit together and taking care of business. Fun is a luxury rarely had. My money is tight enough air can barely squeeze through, everything is budgeted, especialy fun. Do the right things and pay your parents back, and you are one hell of a man, and a animal. -T.

Thanks T.... Now if I could get my girl to understand that....

Ricky P
03-17-08, 8:51 pm
J, keep your head up brother. I've got loans and bills to pay off myself, working 7 days a week right now with no end in sight. Just feels good to start knocking the payments down a little bit at a time. In a couple months it'll be all the way down to just a little bit left, and I can't wait to put it all behind me and start with a clean slate. Just keep your head up and your eyes focused on the light at the end of that tunnel.

Themostocles
03-17-08, 9:00 pm
Thanks T.... Now if I could get my girl to understand that....

Give her time. If everything came easy, would it ever be worth it? -T.

Sir J-Werk
03-17-08, 9:19 pm
J, keep your head up brother. I've got loans and bills to pay off myself, working 7 days a week right now with no end in sight. Just feels good to start knocking the payments down a little bit at a time. In a couple months it'll be all the way down to just a little bit left, and I can't wait to put it all behind me and start with a clean slate. Just keep your head up and your eyes focused on the light at the end of that tunnel.

Thanks Brother. I know what you're saying. It took me a long time to come to grips that it was just going to take some time to clear away things.... It's moved along faster than what I thought it would in the beginning but sometimes frustration still sneaks back in.... especially when people just don't get it.


Give her time. If everything came easy, would it ever be worth it? -T.

I know Bro.... I've been patient about it.... It's already caused a couple of stupid fucking arguements.... I was upfront about the whole situation before we had anything going on so it's not like I kept secrets.... One day at a time.

Themostocles
03-17-08, 9:24 pm
Well God knows I am a little slow sometimes, and knowing a fact isn't always understanding it. -T.

Madcat
03-17-08, 9:32 pm
Hey bro Ive been following your thread alot since you started and trust me I know the feeling.
I want ya to know that the girl who will understand is out there, its just gonna hit you when you least expect it.

After my last 2.5yr relationship, all through my final yrs of college(marriage was discussed heavily) I never thought Id find someone else. Although I havent, I ve come to realize you cant go looking for it.

Its there, but its coming to youi.

Your pics show alot of progress, keep it up and keep it real!

Sir J-Werk
03-17-08, 9:47 pm
Well God knows I am a little slow sometimes, and knowing a fact isn't always understanding it. -T.

True.... But for some reason when I say, "Baby, I can't because I don't have the money...." I still have to explain myself.... Talk about beating your balls with a monkey wrench....


Hey bro Ive been following your thread alot since you started and trust me I know the feeling.
I want ya to know that the girl who will understand is out there, its just gonna hit you when you least expect it.

After my last 2.5yr relationship, all through my final yrs of college(marriage was discussed heavily) I never thought Id find someone else. Although I havent, I ve come to realize you cant go looking for it.

Its there, but its coming to youi.

Your pics show alot of progress, keep it up and keep it real!

Thanks Bro.

My girl is a good girl and I am a fortunate man to be with her.... i do my best to take my shoes off and take a look from where she is coming from but sometimes it racks my brain trying to reach an understanding.... She's a pusher, but in a good way.

Themostocles
03-17-08, 10:01 pm
Damn, a monkey wrench? OUCH!

Sir J-Werk
03-17-08, 10:03 pm
Damn, a monkey wrench? OUCH!

I don't fuck around. LOL

Themostocles
03-17-08, 10:30 pm
I always prefered vise, but to each his own lol. -T

Ricky P
03-17-08, 10:35 pm
Thanks Brother. I know what you're saying. It took me a long time to come to grips that it was just going to take some time to clear away things.... It's moved along faster than what I thought it would in the beginning but sometimes frustration still sneaks back in.... especially when people just don't get it.

Trust me, I hear that.. At first it always seems to move at a snail's pace.... But once you just start busting out that work hardcore, when you look up you're months into it and you'd almost have it no other way. You get into a routine and it's less stressful knowing it's being taken care of. You wake up, you work, you workout, you pay your bills. You start to develop a structure and a plan. Before you know it, you'll be able to do what you want without the bills piling up. It's a great feeling and I can't wait to get back there and I'm sure you can't wait either. That's what this place is great for, we're in it together brother. Let's get shit done.

Sir J-Werk
03-17-08, 10:35 pm
I always prefered vise, but to each his own lol. -T

Meh, too much time with a vice.... Monkey wrench is more immediate.... Wham-Bam, done.

Sir J-Werk
04-22-08, 11:35 pm
Well it's been a while since I have visited this thread.... I always get a good laugh at myself whenever I go back over and read some of the things I have wrote.... I just think to myself, "What the fuck was that all about? Really...."

Now I understand why my therapist always encouraged me to write....

But dispite all the shit that I have written in here and the mind purging over in my journey, my life is good.... My family is awesome, my girl kicks ass, I have made some damn good new friends, and I am really fired up about taking my training to a new level in the very immediate future....

Seems like I finally have some solid pieces in place.... I've alwalys liked that about good news.... It's simple and it sure the hell is sweet.

Northman
04-23-08, 12:51 am
Well it's been a while since I have visited this thread.... I always get a good laugh at myself whenever I go back over and read some of the things I have wrote.... I just think to myself, "What the fuck was that all about? Really...."

Now I understand why my therapist always encouraged me to write....

But dispite all the shit that I have written in here and the mind purging over in my journey, my life is good.... My family is awesome, my girl kicks ass, I have made some damn good new friends, and I am really fired up about taking my training to a new level in the very immediate future....

Seems like I finally have some solid pieces in place.... I've alwalys liked that about good news.... It's simple and it sure the hell is sweet.

When things are broken down, we really have good lives. There are so many less fortunate individuals out there.

Themostocles
04-23-08, 5:51 am
Well it's been a while since I have visited this thread.... I always get a good laugh at myself whenever I go back over and read some of the things I have wrote.... I just think to myself, "What the fuck was that all about? Really...."

Now I understand why my therapist always encouraged me to write....

But dispite all the shit that I have written in here and the mind purging over in my journey, my life is good.... My family is awesome, my girl kicks ass, I have made some damn good new friends, and I am really fired up about taking my training to a new level in the very immediate future....

Seems like I finally have some solid pieces in place.... I've alwalys liked that about good news.... It's simple and it sure the hell is sweet.

Glad things are going well for you J. Keep it up. -T.

Sir J-Werk
04-23-08, 5:14 pm
When things are broken down, we really have good lives. There are so many less fortunate individuals out there.

True.... But we sure do think ourselves important at times, don't we....


Glad things are going well for you J. Keep it up. -T.

Thanks Seth.

Sir J-Werk
05-20-08, 9:45 pm
Lately I have had more unscheduled days off from the gym than I would have liked to.... It's just random shit too.... For example, right now I have a terrible sunburn that covers my entire upper body, backs of my calves, and tops of my feet.... It wasn't because I was dicking around, I was working, getting outside, not being a lazy ass.... And now I'm sitting here on day #5 and can still feel every fiber of this shirt on my skin....

To me shit like this is like starting over and I don't like it.... I really felt like I was hitting a groove finally with all my gains and now all I can do is sit and wait until I think I can stand having a bar across my back, or lay on a bench and not feel like my skin is being ripped off.... But I have so many things on my plate that need devouring.... I have finally for the first time in my life busted into the 200's in bench.... I never thought I would see myself squating 225lbs.... And finally a 315lb deadlift.... All goals, all milestones that need to be improved upon, that need to take there place in the books.... And here I am going over it in my head.... waiting.

However, knowing that I want to get after those things with purpose is a pretty peaceful anxiety.... Which is better than quiting.

Maharg
05-20-08, 9:54 pm
Lately I have had more unscheduled days off from the gym than I would have liked to.... It's just random shit too.... For example, right now I have a terrible sunburn that covers my entire upper body, backs of my calves, and tops of my feet.... It wasn't because I was dicking around, I was working, getting outside, not being a lazy ass.... And now I'm sitting here on day #5 and can still feel every fiber of this shirt on my skin....

To me shit like this is like starting over and I don't like it.... I really felt like I was hitting a groove finally with all my gains and now all I can do is sit and wait until I think I can stand having a bar across my back, or lay on a bench and not feel like my skin is being ripped off.... But I have so many things on my plate that need devouring.... I have finally for the first time in my life busted into the 200's in bench.... I never thought I would see myself squating 225lbs.... And finally a 315lb deadlift.... All goals, all milestones that need to be improved upon, that need to take there place in the books.... And here I am going over it in my head.... waiting.

However, knowing that I want to get after those things with purpose is a pretty peaceful anxiety.... Which is better than quiting.

Man, i have had more then one time got sun burns so bad i had to give up training for awhile. It will heal up, and you will be right back.

Northman
05-20-08, 10:35 pm
Lately I have had more unscheduled days off from the gym than I would have liked to.... It's just random shit too.... For example, right now I have a terrible sunburn that covers my entire upper body, backs of my calves, and tops of my feet.... It wasn't because I was dicking around, I was working, getting outside, not being a lazy ass.... And now I'm sitting here on day #5 and can still feel every fiber of this shirt on my skin....

To me shit like this is like starting over and I don't like it.... I really felt like I was hitting a groove finally with all my gains and now all I can do is sit and wait until I think I can stand having a bar across my back, or lay on a bench and not feel like my skin is being ripped off.... But I have so many things on my plate that need devouring.... I have finally for the first time in my life busted into the 200's in bench.... I never thought I would see myself squating 225lbs.... And finally a 315lb deadlift.... All goals, all milestones that need to be improved upon, that need to take there place in the books.... And here I am going over it in my head.... waiting.

However, knowing that I want to get after those things with purpose is a pretty peaceful anxiety.... Which is better than quiting.

What about lidocaine?

Sir J-Werk
05-20-08, 11:47 pm
What about lidocaine?

Sprays and lotions never take the edge off.... I don't know why.... The best thing, for me, believe it or not is Ibuprofen.

Northman
05-21-08, 12:01 am
Sprays and lotions never take the edge off.... I don't know why.... The best thing, for me, believe it or not is Ibuprofen.

No way! I would avoid it if you can. There is some evidence it could interfere with neuromuscular signals and recovery.

Themostocles
05-21-08, 1:12 am
Aloe is the only thing that even takes off the edge for me. And even then not by much. You will be over it quick, just rest, that way you can hit it hard when you get back to the weights. -T.

Themostocles
08-19-08, 4:14 am
You ever going to write anything in here lol, its only been three months. -T.

Sir J-Werk
08-19-08, 3:20 pm
.... Just for you Seth.... I'm sure you all remember Zod from the Superman movies.... If not google him or just enjoy the story. lol


Camping; a journal entry

Lately I have been feeling a bit out of sorts, due to ever-increasing pressure to track down the son of Jor-el as well as balance an ever tumultuous personal life. Ursa flew over last week and was nearly in tears- apparently she had a bit to drink during a company happy hour and went home with a middle manager at her firm. Then he began refusing her calls and denied it even happened. I do feel terrible for her as a friend, however what frustrates me is how easily I am branded a "friend" by her and she feels the need to unleash her man problems upon me. After comforting her (which I should really stop doing) I decided that a weekend camping is what I needed.

I decided to invite Non along for company. Being a deaf mute, he does not provide adequate conversation, but his presence alone would be a comfort during these times. Besides, we are both bearded, and we have that in common to fall back upon.

Non arrived late as usual, along with an acquaintance of his, Bob from Local 118. He was apparently a camping expert, having claimed to have pitched many tents at the area gentlemans club. After trying on, then ultimately deciding against wearing some newly purchased caterpillar boots from Target, I decided to instead wear my normal black vinyl highboots and we set off. Being an inferior being, Bob was unable to fly, and instead was strapped to Nons back. I silently laughed at the subtle homoeroticism of the situation.

When we arrived at the campsite, we realized we had forgotten the food, save for a can of pork n beans, two packs of Keebler Toasties, and a warm Capri-Sun. Non tried to start a fire using his heat vision on a stick but I reminded him what had happened the last time he tried that. Then we laughed at the sweet nostalgia of our salad days.

At this point Bob was nowhere to be found. Using my x-ray vision (which is fading on me, I need to get it checked) I found him behind a cluster of trees, enjoying the case of Busch beer he had been holding out on. In anger, I used my power that was clearly undocumented in comic book form but appeared randomly in movie form to fire a mysterious bolt of white energy from my outstretched palm and used it to lift him up high from the ground. Then I released him, letting him fall onto a pile of hay. These weak humans, I had meant to simply frighten him into sharing his beer. However, he seemed quite injured. Most of his beer was gone, Non had already devoured the pork n beans and was gassing up a storm, and now it was beginning to rain. The camping weekend away amounted to nothing short of a complete disaster. We packed up any remaining gear and returned to the city.

I sent Non to take Bob to an emergency room and I returned to my apartment. I was home already and it was only Saturday night. Blast! I wonder what Ursa is doing tonight? No! I will not call her. Instead I simply drank what was left of the Capri-Sun and alphabetized my pornography. I never thought a relaxing weekend would turn out so taxing.

I need something more in my life. This constant pursuit of Jor-El and failures in my personal life is draining me more than I ever would have thought. But I am beginning life anew. Perhaps I will get a dog. I want you to think about this, as you bow down before me.[/QUOTE]

Themostocles
08-19-08, 10:36 pm
LMAO! You are a complete nerd J lol. -T.

Sir J-Werk
07-07-09, 6:46 pm
When I recently re-enrolled in college this past month I chose to take one class to get back in the swing of things. Since I had to get some gen-eds knocked out I closed my eyes and blindly picked the first subject under my fingertip; General Psychology.

Turns out it was one of the best classes I have ever taken.... And to say that earns it merit since I my college days extend back almost a decade.... But setting aside all the things we learned about the regions of the brain, Pavlov's dogs, Maslow's hierarchy, Piaget's stages of development, and so on, the one thing that really stuck in my head was a simple handout our instructor gave us about procrastination.

Stating that one of the reasons people procrastinate is because they fear that the final product will not be perfect, being perfectionists themselves, they will put off doing the task....

And there lies my biggest underlying problem. If I cannot perform a task 110% to the letter I put it off, I rationalized ignorantly with myself why i can always stop for an undetermined amount of time and come back to it when conditions are perfect to my tastes.... God damn it, do you understand how many things I have wasted because of this cracked-ass thinking? That list is long and distinguished and for another day but here lies one of them.

I loved lifting! I cursed the fact that I didn't find it until my late 20's and poured everything I had into it to make up for lost time. But slowly this little fucking voice in the back of my head started up; You aren't doing this right, you can't afford to do this right, you aren't eating right, You're still not pushing yourself, You aren't going to make gains because you are pissing around.... And like that, I justifyied taking time off and haven't stepped a foot inside a gym sense.

I feel so miscued.... Nothing seems to be firing in sequence like "I think it should." It's strange to read these words isn't it? The easy response is, "Get the fuck over it and do something about it! Argh! Animal! For the win!", but it is the strangest, debilitating, thing to deal with. You would think that a person who claims to be a "perfectionist" would be out doing but it is completely bass ackwards.... I can't get a fire lit under my ass for nothing.... to accept that I cannot do everything perfectly.... I fucking hate it.

Sir J-Werk
03-24-11, 9:06 am
"They may beat me but they will bleed to do it" - Steve Prefontaine

Themostocles
03-25-11, 3:39 am
You show upa nd so does the snow again.... A curse I say!

Sir J-Werk
04-20-11, 4:41 am
You show upa nd so does the snow again.... A curse I say!

That's how this shit started last time.... at least I'm consistent-ish.

Bruiser
04-21-11, 9:39 am
Welcome back bro. I laughed my ass off at the irony of you having a one year gap before posting "The Psychology of Procrastination" and then another year and a half before your next post after that!! lol

I understand completely where you're comming from though. I was in this game so deep that all I could see was perfection on everyone but myself. Then a back injury laid me up for several years. Other than the pain and risk of reinjury, the worry that I couldn't put my all into it and get the best results kept me from moving on. But here we are again. Welcome back.