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Psycho77
11-01-08, 7:34 am
the rambling.......

the vents.......

the random throws of ideas........

the cheers......

the sorrows.......

the pain of defeat......

the joy of success.......



Random musings of a mind ready to bleed out from the daily struggles of life, love and iron............it all goes here.

Psycho77
11-01-08, 7:50 am
I came into the world alone and I will probably leave it alone. Sucks but I have accepted that fact about my fate. Sad? at times but never for long. Self-pity, please, give me a fucking break, i'm not the type.

Sure I have friends here and there. People I share the same passions and do the same stuff with. We work together, play together, train together. Its all fun and laughs. But when the sun sets and all is said and done. I go back to my place, go to my room and just enjoy the solace and tranquility of being alone.

I read a good book, watch a fav program on the tube or just listen to tunes. This is the moments that I cherish. I can have my POW or night meals in peace. No chit chat about the trivial non-sense of general life. Its the time where I can lick my wounds or get pissed at myself for not working hard enough, for not getting sore enough. Its the time where I plan out my attack for the coming day.

When I am alone, no one judges me about the type of person that I am or what I want to ultimately become. I turn off the lights and head on to dream of the day when I reach my goals. And wake up hours later in the same state as when I slept..........alone.

KiNgKoNgPrOnGeD
11-01-08, 7:58 am
Nice shit dude. At the end of the day we are reminded how we got to being where we are. All by ourself, all on our own time, "we are our maker".
Hope to see more of this in the future.

Psycho77
11-04-08, 5:45 am
I was driving down the freeway one early morning. On my way to the mountains to grab breakfast. A nice cup of strong coffee and some pasties, sandwiches and pasta in the cool mountain air and the sunrise for a view is something I was looking forward to when I got there.

It was supposed to be a quick 3 min drive but this morning was different. I didn't feel rushed. I had no schedule to keep. I came to a point where I had to make a turn to the mountains, if I miss it, its going to be an hour's more drive to get there.

The practical me said to turn off the freeway, but somehow, I just didn't I pass the turn off and kept going. with the price of gas nowadays, its just stupid to waste it all on taking an hour and a half drive to a place you can reach in 30 mins. But this was a different morning, the fog was light (or should I say smog). I dropped the windows down and turned off the a/c and just dropped the pedal hard. Im now dedicated to "the long way round".

This move made me cut through the opposite side of the mountain to get to where im going, but it was ok. The drive was perfectly fun. Empty freeway, no cop in sight. Screaming engine and wind in your hair, this is life.

I get to the mountains and found a new route, its long, insanely inclined, corners you never knew would be possible. I hit those fast, really fast. G forces where throwing my stuff all over the car. Damn I love this, faster and faster. Tires screamed for mercy. Soon my traction control was blinking like christmas lights. I felt the computer taking over, taking control of the accelerator and brakes. Dammet, not now, don't hold me back now. I reach over and fiddle for the button and shut the fucker off. Warning lights flash on the dash and I kept fucking going. Faster and faster, sliding at corners and leaving deep back lines in the pavement under braking. Keep going I said.

That was a few minutes of sheer adrenaline but felt like forever. I arrived at the mountain top, and slowed down. Easy driving, cool the car down. I smelled it, the sweet scent of burned rubber, toasted brakes and fried clutch. My heart was still going 160 and when I car was running 20. Parked and went to the coffee shop.

I am now having my coffee and my pastry and pasta coming up. I thought to myself. that was a fucking fun drive. Sure the other route was shorter, easier but then had I taken that route, I wouldnt be sitting here telling you all about it.

That run stuck with me, its going to stick with me till I do something else that will top that and then Im still going to be sitting here telling you all about that and then some.

it is not about the distance traveled but the journey that is important. like in the gym, there will always be diversions. we can chose to take shortcuts to take us to where we wanna go faster. it will sure be easier. but that will just be a hollow victory in my opinion. After all, its not about the distance or the destination that is important, its the JOURNEY thats really imporant.

And if your wondering, I took the long way back down. It was much more fun.

On Letting Go
11-04-08, 7:00 am
Well put, bro. The JOURNEY is what makes the man, not the destination.

Psycho77
11-16-08, 9:03 am
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth

Then took the other as just as fair
And having perhaps the better claim
Because it was grassy and wanted wear
Though as for that, the passing there
Had worn them really about the same

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet, knowing how way leads onto way
I doubted if I should ever come back

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence
Two roads diverged in a wood
And I took the one less traveled by
And that has made all the difference



And so the poem goes. Tonight I arrive at that part of my life where my road diverged in two. But before I get into that, a quick flash back to my life as a youngling.

You see, we didn't have much when I was growing up. Not that we were poor, just that I couldn't just get what I wanted when I wanted it. I never went out much with my friends coz I didn't have much cash to throw around and have a good time. I still got into private school tho. My folks worked hard to barely make my school payments so I had to make my education count. I graduated and got my degree in Computer Science from one of the best universities in the country. I got my first job as an office assistant, doing odd jobs like research and typing jobs for my boss. I worked my butt out there to get that one chance at a promotion. My boss eventually saw something in me, a potential and gave me my big break. He started taking me to meetings, made me part of projects. 3 years later the office assistant is now a project manager in charge of a team of 10 programmers, graphics artists and database experts. I got a big salary boost and finally, I was able to buy the shit that so longed for. Bought me a second hand car, which I still own today, its 14 years old and I love it, near mint condition. I saved up enough to leave the company I worked for and start my own consulting firm. The employee is now an employer. But the tradeoff does have its ups and downs. I can arrange for free time for me to handle my business in the gym. On the other hand, there will be times when projects are few and far between that cash flow does get interrupted. But i dont mind, as long as I can afford food and my animal supps I'll be alright.

Going back to the diversion, I just came from a dinner interview with representatives of a large multinational company which is interested in hiring me as a senior project manager in charge of projects in the asian region. The job is perfect, the pay is awesome. Retirement package, travel, cars, you name it. I can have it all, in exchange for something vital...............time. See, the job will entail a lot of hopping around from one country or province to another. Hence the confusion. I say yes, my training as an ANIMAL will definitely get screwed. Probably train once a week at most if at all. I have to give em an answer by tom and if my answer is yes, then i fly off to Singapore on wed to sign contracts and meet my team for the first project.

Most normal people will say, there shouldn't be any confusion here. The choice is clear, go for the job and screw the gym. But we are not normal people, not by a long shot. I love working out too much to just drop it all at the toss of a hat. My mind is saying go for it, my inner beast is saying dont do it. The inner turmoil is giving me such a headache. Sooner or later, I may have to settle this in the most stupid of all ways.................a toss of a coin. arrgggghhhh.

diesel1976
11-16-08, 8:01 pm
I am one who likes to have my cake and eat it too but, Is it possible you could take the job and train anyway, youll just have to be training at different gyms all the time and have a travel case for all your supps. Just curious.

The Sun
11-22-08, 10:02 am
I was driving down the freeway one early morning. On my way to the mountains to grab breakfast. A nice cup of strong coffee and some pasties, sandwiches and pasta in the cool mountain air and the sunrise for a view is something I was looking forward to when I got there.

It was supposed to be a quick 3 min drive but this morning was different. I didn't feel rushed. I had no schedule to keep. I came to a point where I had to make a turn to the mountains, if I miss it, its going to be an hour's more drive to get there.

The practical me said to turn off the freeway, but somehow, I just didn't I pass the turn off and kept going. with the price of gas nowadays, its just stupid to waste it all on taking an hour and a half drive to a place you can reach in 30 mins. But this was a different morning, the fog was light (or should I say smog). I dropped the windows down and turned off the a/c and just dropped the pedal hard. Im now dedicated to "the long way round".

This move made me cut through the opposite side of the mountain to get to where im going, but it was ok. The drive was perfectly fun. Empty freeway, no cop in sight. Screaming engine and wind in your hair, this is life.

I get to the mountains and found a new route, its long, insanely inclined, corners you never knew would be possible. I hit those fast, really fast. G forces where throwing my stuff all over the car. Damn I love this, faster and faster. Tires screamed for mercy. Soon my traction control was blinking like christmas lights. I felt the computer taking over, taking control of the accelerator and brakes. Dammet, not now, don't hold me back now. I reach over and fiddle for the button and shut the fucker off. Warning lights flash on the dash and I kept fucking going. Faster and faster, sliding at corners and leaving deep back lines in the pavement under braking. Keep going I said.

That was a few minutes of sheer adrenaline but felt like forever. I arrived at the mountain top, and slowed down. Easy driving, cool the car down. I smelled it, the sweet scent of burned rubber, toasted brakes and fried clutch. My heart was still going 160 and when I car was running 20. Parked and went to the coffee shop.

I am now having my coffee and my pastry and pasta coming up. I thought to myself. that was a fucking fun drive. Sure the other route was shorter, easier but then had I taken that route, I wouldnt be sitting here telling you all about it.

That run stuck with me, its going to stick with me till I do something else that will top that and then Im still going to be sitting here telling you all about that and then some.

it is not about the distance traveled but the journey that is important. like in the gym, there will always be diversions. we can chose to take shortcuts to take us to where we wanna go faster. it will sure be easier. but that will just be a hollow victory in my opinion. After all, its not about the distance or the destination that is important, its the JOURNEY thats really imporant.

And if your wondering, I took the long way back down. It was much more fun.

The journey is what brings us happiness not the destination

That's in my signature for a long time. this is the real truth.
we just love busting our asses.

soulspline
05-11-09, 11:22 pm
nice words there brother