belladiabla13
03-20-09, 9:52 pm
~This was my blog today on myspace. Chuck asked me to post it here~...
I am struggling with myself even now as I write this. I do not want to be one of those people who look down on others. I want to help others. I do not want to come across as though even for one moment, I find myself to be superior. I do not. I am at the very start of my journey. But, I need to purge myself of this anger and disgust.
Today is leg day. We lift very heavy on leg day. After a dentist appointment Chuck & I decided to stop at a local buffet. Big salad bar and lots of protein, plus we would not have to cook. Good deal.
Yeah, cancel that thought. This place may very well be one of the most motivating places I have ever been in my life.
We quickly got lost into a pool of people just bidding their time until they have a massive heart attack. People being stalked by diabetes, and some near death. People so big and so unhealthy that they had to be wheeled up to the buffet where they piled their plates as high as possible with fried greasy foods. They were ruthless in their quest. Shoving adults and children aside so they could feast on their addiction. It honestly made my stomach hurt. It made my heart hurt. We as a country make jokes about these people. We call them names. We spend our few moments in their shadows and then we simply walk away. But these people are no longer the exception. They are becoming the norm.
I know many of you can not understand my diet. It has been called extreme by most of my family and friends. To tell someone they had to give up chips,cookies,pasta,soda and bread is just crazy..right? I want you all to know that in giving these things up, I am finding myself. I had no idea how strong I really was and I do not mean muscle. I mean sheer heart and determination. I test myself everyday when I drink only water. Of course, I still wake up wanting a soda. Every time I walk into the gym, sore and beat from the day before I test myself. It is so easy to give into the temptation. Instead, I choose to fight for me. Look around, there is fast food on every block. Where can you buy baked fish? Let me answer for you, the grocery. Then you come home and bake it for your damned self. It requires effort. I guess that is more than what the average American has in them these days.
I am just so glad I opened my eyes and choose not to be one of the flock. It is like the old saying "if your friends jumped off of a bridge, would you"? You might want to stop and actually ask yourself how close are you to that ledge.
Peace.
I am struggling with myself even now as I write this. I do not want to be one of those people who look down on others. I want to help others. I do not want to come across as though even for one moment, I find myself to be superior. I do not. I am at the very start of my journey. But, I need to purge myself of this anger and disgust.
Today is leg day. We lift very heavy on leg day. After a dentist appointment Chuck & I decided to stop at a local buffet. Big salad bar and lots of protein, plus we would not have to cook. Good deal.
Yeah, cancel that thought. This place may very well be one of the most motivating places I have ever been in my life.
We quickly got lost into a pool of people just bidding their time until they have a massive heart attack. People being stalked by diabetes, and some near death. People so big and so unhealthy that they had to be wheeled up to the buffet where they piled their plates as high as possible with fried greasy foods. They were ruthless in their quest. Shoving adults and children aside so they could feast on their addiction. It honestly made my stomach hurt. It made my heart hurt. We as a country make jokes about these people. We call them names. We spend our few moments in their shadows and then we simply walk away. But these people are no longer the exception. They are becoming the norm.
I know many of you can not understand my diet. It has been called extreme by most of my family and friends. To tell someone they had to give up chips,cookies,pasta,soda and bread is just crazy..right? I want you all to know that in giving these things up, I am finding myself. I had no idea how strong I really was and I do not mean muscle. I mean sheer heart and determination. I test myself everyday when I drink only water. Of course, I still wake up wanting a soda. Every time I walk into the gym, sore and beat from the day before I test myself. It is so easy to give into the temptation. Instead, I choose to fight for me. Look around, there is fast food on every block. Where can you buy baked fish? Let me answer for you, the grocery. Then you come home and bake it for your damned self. It requires effort. I guess that is more than what the average American has in them these days.
I am just so glad I opened my eyes and choose not to be one of the flock. It is like the old saying "if your friends jumped off of a bridge, would you"? You might want to stop and actually ask yourself how close are you to that ledge.
Peace.