Kids now-a-days

[MAB]

After the gym today I was talking on the phone with my mom; she was updating me on some family matters. My grandparents are raising one of my cousins... he's almost done with High School, has his driver's license and is close to turning 18. He is a complete ass. His two older brothers can not stand him and have tried talking some sense into him for years now. He's verbally abusive to my grandparents and disrespectful as all get out.

My grandmother just had surgery on her two big toes a few weeks ago and she's had some issues healing (we all know that as you get older you don't heal as quickly). This past Friday my grandma had a cataract remove from her eye, so yet another surgery... Apparently Friday when my grandparents were in the hospital for my grandma's surgery my cousin took my grandpa's truck out and wrecked it. When my grandma was talking to my mom today on the phone my mom heard my cousin (who had his gf over) tell my grandma that she and my grandpa needed to get out of the house so he could be alone with his gf. When she told him that she was resting like her doctor told her to he told her to f*ck off...

I want to know, seriously, what is wrong with kids these days. I would never have dreamed of telling an elder to f off, I would have never dreamed to tell them they needed to leave the house that they work hard to own. I even notice with the kids where I work (ages 2-5) there are major respect issues. We have 5yr olds who are hitting and throwing things at teachers. Their parents make up all sorts of excuses for them, deny that their child would act in such a manner, or tell us that they're at their wits end and can't control their children. Whatever happened to a good whipping? I know it won't solve all problems... but this new thought process that children should do the right thing bc it's the right thing is stupid. One they're too young to have that level of thought outside their direct world and two adults don't always do the right thing simply bc it's the right thing to do.

I feel that my cousin needs a good a$$ kicking... he needs to know that he's not the baddest dude out there. He needs to be put in his place. It makes me so mad that my grandparents who have worked so hard for everything they have and are both retired have to put up with him and his antics.

Just needed to vent.

[Sandman]

You hit the nail on the head, it's Respect and kids now-a-days have NONE! I was just talkin to the guys I work with about this. We have some young supervisors at the facility I work at and they think cause they have a title thy deserve respect. They have no idea that its a two way street and that you have to earn Respect.

[deanna7272]

You answered your own question...

No respect, self righteous (without reason), feel entitled, lack responsibility, do not respect their parents let alone anyone else (and parents ALLOW it to happen), need instant gratification rather than developing work ethic, etc... I could go on....

Teaching middle school has really opened my eyes... I can't believe how parents allow their kids to talk TO them, let alone AROUND them. ((I was 19, IN COLLEGE, when I first said one of the "bad" words that you hear in church!! NEVER said the F word to or around her in my 36 years with her!)) To hear the kids talking now, if I would have spoke like that, I would be sporting a wonderful set of chompers because my mother would have knocked my original sets down my throat!!! I have seen parent's FBs and they are their kid's friends... Sme conversations would blow your mind, IF you can decipher which is the child and which is the parent!!

And to think, these punks are our future...

[Merc_enary]

The problem is that realistically parents are not as tough as they should be in some cases and in other the "system" is all fucked. I am Puertorican, born and raised on the island, and to this date, mind you i am 26 y/o, i would never consider any of the above and when talking to the elderly on my family its "sir" or ma'am". As my grandma' used to say "Let him cry, he doesnt cry blood, hes not going to die".

[BigChrisF]

I don't think it's kids these days. Every generation has their complaints. Assholes aren't a new phenomenon. I've seen some kids and adults that are real bastards. I can remember kids and adults from my youth that were the same way. The prevalence of social media has magnified the issue. It gives everyone a public forum without any discretion as to whether or not they should be using it.

[deanna7272]

I don't think it's kids these days. Every generation has their complaints. Assholes aren't a new phenomenon. I've seen some kids and adults that are real bastards. I can remember kids and adults from my youth that were the same way. The prevalence of social media has magnified the issue. It gives everyone a public forum without any discretion as to whether or not they should be using it.

Social media is a great way for imbeciles to gather their Army... Being a teacher, I have taken the hit involving social media and because there is NO recourse for their actions. I get to walk into my classroom/gym with a smile on my face, having a cheery disposition, and treating each and every student equally. (Which I do because they ARE still children.) It's difficult KNOWING that they just attempted to destroy my character, reputation, etc. because they broke the rules and it came down to them being held responsible for their actions. It was just much easier when they just passed a handwritten note to their best friend telling them how terrible they thought you were...lol

I just think that a total disregard for the importance of respect for each other in today's world...

[Bruiser]

You answered your own question...

No respect, self righteous (without reason), feel entitled, lack responsibility, do not respect their parents let alone anyone else (and parents ALLOW it to happen), need instant gratification rather than developing work ethic, etc... I could go on....

Teaching middle school has really opened my eyes... I can't believe how parents allow their kids to talk TO them, let alone AROUND them. ((I was 19, IN COLLEGE, when I first said one of the "bad" words that you hear in church!! NEVER said the F word to or around her in my 36 years with her!)) To hear the kids talking now, if I would have spoke like that, I would be sporting a wonderful set of chompers because my mother would have knocked my original sets down my throat!!! I have seen parent's FBs and they are their kid's friends... Sme conversations would blow your mind, IF you can decipher which is the child and which is the parent!!

And to think, these punks are our future...

Exactly! I've got a 13 year old step son who is mouthy and disrespectful to me. If I would have ever (EVEN ONCE) given the dirty looks to my parents that he gives me on a daily basis I would've gotten the hell beat outta me! And he's the best behaved one of all has friends! Scary....


I don't think it's kids these days. Every generation has their complaints. Assholes aren't a new phenomenon. I've seen some kids and adults that are real bastards. I can remember kids and adults from my youth that were the same way. The prevalence of social media has magnified the issue. It gives everyone a public forum without any discretion as to whether or not they should be using it.

Very good point. Social media has changed the way our kids will grow up. When I was a kid, if someone pissed you off you had to wait and think about what happened before you could react, and if it was still an issue on Monday you beat to shit out of ecahother and it was done. Now the second that one of these whiny little shits feels like they were wronged, they blast somebody all over FB. It's where the bullying starts and where the bad attitudes are inflated.

[Universal Rep]

Bad kids or bad parenting??? Or both?

[deanna7272]

Bad kids or bad parenting??? Or both?

Maybe not "bad" parenting... The "lack" of good parental skills OR looking out for oneself rather than the success of their children in society... As they say, it trickles down, believe it. Now, I do know of parents for the most part do whatever possible to insure success, but still deal with issues... So who really knows....

Another reason that I was "okay" with never having children... I saw the turmoil that my mother went through with her kids (excluding her Princess, of course... he he he) but she raised us all the same in the same house, but they were menaces to society, addicts, etc... I have 300+ kids a year that I deal with on a one on one basis... Some make me happy, some make me sad, some are successful, some are not, but I give them all the benefit of the doubt and try to teach them "a little"... My biggest lesson is... "NEVER MAKE YOUR MOMMAS CRY!!" It worked for me and kept me out of a lot of predicaments...lol

[G Diesel]

I can see it from both perspectives equally, actually.

My folks raised me a certain way. Not ultra-strict, able to have my own opinions, encouraged to be my own person and speak my mind. But there was always a premium to be placed on respect for elders, teachers, parents, coaches, etc. Whether I agreed or disagreed with them, the status those people had was worthy of a certain amount of respect. The fact that I was a kid and they were adults who paid their dues and contributed to society, demanded they be treated right. Whether I liked them or not. One thing that was important to me, was the fact that I was a reflection of my parents. When I was kind, polite and articulate, I made my folks look good. When I was a cocky prick, quite the contrary. So I went out of my way to try to represent them right. By the time I was out of school, it became more clearly obvious what some kids, and some of my peers, lacked in their upbringing. I feel like various forms of media (TV, music, film) and the internet, exacerbated the damage left by that void that and kids' attitudes in many cases, have gotten worse and worse. You can call them Generation Nothingness or Generation Me or whatever you like, but it almost feels like nihilism or extreme apathy and ennui, with no regard for authority, consequences or the future. It is really sad.

Then again, I often hear old folks shit on kids and speak from a self-righteous soapbox about blah blah blah and back in my day and all this shit that really just makes them sound like out of touch, bitter assholes. When we pass judgement on these children, still in their formative years, we give them a sense of hopelessness and reinforce their "fuck it" attitude. I never want to be one of those guys. Showing a kid that you can relate and having a certain amount of understanding for their perspective, can really go a long way.

Peace, G

[Universal Rep]

Maybe not "bad" parenting... The "lack" of good parental skills OR looking out for oneself rather than the success of their children in society... As they say, it trickles down, believe it. Now, I do know of parents for the most part do whatever possible to insure success, but still deal with issues... So who really knows....

Another reason that I was "okay" with never having children... I saw the turmoil that my mother went through with her kids (excluding her Princess, of course... he he he) but she raised us all the same in the same house, but they were menaces to society, addicts, etc... I have 300+ kids a year that I deal with on a one on one basis... Some make me happy, some make me sad, some are successful, some are not, but I give them all the benefit of the doubt and try to teach them "a little"... My biggest lesson is... "NEVER MAKE YOUR MOMMAS CRY!!" It worked for me and kept me out of a lot of predicaments...lol

Bad parenting is still bad parenting even tho the intentions might be good. Whether they dont know any better, lack skills or what not, society as a whole dont benefit from good parental intentions but can def get harmed without actual implementation, esp. if kids go bad and commit crimes for example. But ur right... In some cases, no amt of good parenting can make a diff with sum kids.


I can see it from both perspectives equally, actually.

My folks raised me a certain way. Not ultra-strict, able to have my own opinions, encouraged to be my own person and speak my mind. But there was always a premium to be placed on respect for elders, teachers, parents, coaches, etc. Whether I agreed or disagreed with them, the status those people had was worthy of a certain amount of respect. The fact that I was a kid and they were adults who paid their dues and contributed to society, demanded they be treated right. Whether I liked them or not. One thing that was important to me, was the fact that I was a reflection of my parents. When I was kind, polite and articulate, I made my folks look good. When I was a cocky prick, quite the contrary. So I went out of my way to try to represent them right. By the time I was out of school, it became more clearly obvious what some kids, and some of my peers, lacked in their upbringing. I feel like various forms of media (TV, music, film) and the internet, exacerbated the damage left by that void that and kids' attitudes in many cases, have gotten worse and worse. You can call them Generation Nothingness or Generation Me or whatever you like, but it almost feels like nihilism or extreme apathy and ennui, with no regard for authority, consequences or the future. It is really sad.

Then again, I often hear old folks shit on kids and speak from a self-righteous soapbox about blah blah blah and back in my day and all this shit that really just makes them sound like out of touch, bitter assholes. When we pass judgement on these children, still in their formative years, we give them a sense of hopelessness and reinforce their "fuck it" attitude. I never want to be one of those guys. Showing a kid that you can relate and having a certain amount of understanding for their perspective, can really go a long way.

Peace, G

Mebbe u were just a good kid...

[G Diesel]

Mebbe u were just a good kid...

Nah I just had good parents, who I sincerely didn't want to let down.

But this comes down to heredity vs environment. The oldest behavior argument in the book.

Peace, G

[Universal Rep]

Nah I just had good parents, who I sincerely didn't want to let down.

But this comes down to heredity vs environment. The oldest behavior argument in the book.

Peace, G

If true, thus the importance of good parenting skills and its impact on society as a whole...

Aint one or the other but always both in my book.

[Mr. Dead]

If true, thus the importance of good parenting skills and its impact on society as a whole...

Aint one or the other but always both in my book.

This...

[deanna7272]

Nah I just had good parents, who I sincerely didn't want to let down.

But this comes down to heredity vs environment. The oldest behavior argument in the book.

Peace, G

I am the poster child for this... I tell my students the importance of choosing their own paths... My siblings had a different father, the difference in our personalities (they are very aggressive, manipulative, etc) ... Mom could never understand what she did sooo wrong with them.... Heredity....

I never wanted to disappoint my Momma (my Daddy passed when I was 16, so it was just the two of us for years...) I would never want to embarrass her, disappoint her, or upset her in any way, she went through enough already... I knew she expected more out of me...

[World Eater]

I can see it from both perspectives equally, actually.

My folks raised me a certain way. Not ultra-strict, able to have my own opinions, encouraged to be my own person and speak my mind. But there was always a premium to be placed on respect for elders, teachers, parents, coaches, etc. Whether I agreed or disagreed with them, the status those people had was worthy of a certain amount of respect. The fact that I was a kid and they were adults who paid their dues and contributed to society, demanded they be treated right. Whether I liked them or not. One thing that was important to me, was the fact that I was a reflection of my parents. When I was kind, polite and articulate, I made my folks look good. When I was a cocky prick, quite the contrary. So I went out of my way to try to represent them right. By the time I was out of school, it became more clearly obvious what some kids, and some of my peers, lacked in their upbringing. I feel like various forms of media (TV, music, film) and the internet, exacerbated the damage left by that void that and kids' attitudes in many cases, have gotten worse and worse. You can call them Generation Nothingness or Generation Me or whatever you like, but it almost feels like nihilism or extreme apathy and ennui, with no regard for authority, consequences or the future. It is really sad.

Then again, I often hear old folks shit on kids and speak from a self-righteous soapbox about blah blah blah and back in my day and all this shit that really just makes them sound like out of touch, bitter assholes. When we pass judgement on these children, still in their formative years, we give them a sense of hopelessness and reinforce their "fuck it" attitude. I never want to be one of those guys. Showing a kid that you can relate and having a certain amount of understanding for their perspective, can really go a long way.

Peace, G\
Agreed. I was raised with respect but also allowed to do what I want and I've always been respectful to others, though as I grow older I get more respectful towards those who deserve is, less so to those who don't - my uncle for example is a greedy bastard who socializes and goes for coffee with my grandparents and granduncles/aunts more often simply because he's after their inheritance, and I don't hesitate to tell him he's a douche for doing so. My parents, grandparents and teachers however, I treat with the respect they deserve.

As for the old folks part, I'm reminded of that every time I'm on Facebook and see one of those "we are the childs of the 40s,50s, 60s, 70s, we played outside, we did this, we did that, blah blah blah" and people are all over the comments section telling how they're so much better than the current generation because they played outside and kids nowadays are stuck to their computers... Apparently not aware of the fact that if they're parents, it's their own bloody fault their kid doesn't go outside or wasn't raised the way they were.. Soapboxes and high horses.

[MAB]

I can see it from both perspectives equally, actually.

My folks raised me a certain way. Not ultra-strict, able to have my own opinions, encouraged to be my own person and speak my mind. But there was always a premium to be placed on respect for elders, teachers, parents, coaches, etc. Whether I agreed or disagreed with them, the status those people had was worthy of a certain amount of respect. The fact that I was a kid and they were adults who paid their dues and contributed to society, demanded they be treated right. Whether I liked them or not. One thing that was important to me, was the fact that I was a reflection of my parents. When I was kind, polite and articulate, I made my folks look good. When I was a cocky prick, quite the contrary. So I went out of my way to try to represent them right. By the time I was out of school, it became more clearly obvious what some kids, and some of my peers, lacked in their upbringing. I feel like various forms of media (TV, music, film) and the internet, exacerbated the damage left by that void that and kids' attitudes in many cases, have gotten worse and worse. You can call them Generation Nothingness or Generation Me or whatever you like, but it almost feels like nihilism or extreme apathy and ennui, with no regard for authority, consequences or the future. It is really sad.

Then again, I often hear old folks shit on kids and speak from a self-righteous soapbox about blah blah blah and back in my day and all this shit that really just makes them sound like out of touch, bitter assholes. When we pass judgement on these children, still in their formative years, we give them a sense of hopelessness and reinforce their "fuck it" attitude. I never want to be one of those guys. Showing a kid that you can relate and having a certain amount of understanding for their perspective, can really go a long way.

Peace, G


I was much the same... Still to this day I HATE even the thought of disappointing my parents. I was definitely a good kid growing up. Even though I was a good kid, and I was respectful, I still took things my parents did for granted until I was out on my own. That was a big eye opener to how much they actually did for me and my siblings. I was given the freedom to become my own person and to express myself artistically. I was also taught to be responsible for myself. I had a job at the age of 16 and still made the honor roll at school. I played sports and danced. I knew that if I didn't turn in an assignment or if a grade went south that I only had myself to blame and I would do whatever I needed to remedy the situation (didn't run to mommy or daddy to bully the teacher into "fixing" my grade; kids did that then and are still doing it now). I was raised to be respectful, caring, and a hard worker.

I think the hardest thing is that my grandparents already raised their children. They went above and beyond when they took in this cousin (whose mother is still alive & really should be the one raising him). They've both worked so hard for what they have and he's destroying their house, their vehicles, stealing from them (and his older siblings), tearing them down emotionally/ mentally, and they're too old to really put the fear of God in him or even get him to sit down for a heart to heart.

I know I've heard my fair share of "back in my day" stories... some of them are actually quite interesting and give you perspective on how times have changed. I love to hear stories from my grandma about growing up in a "hollar." I like to hear about my grandpa's time in the military or about his many trips overseas as an engineer... I'm not quite sure if I was "taught" to be respectful of my elders or if I just followed by example of my parents. We've always been a pretty tight-knit family. We take care of our own, we're there when the times get tough and that could be another reason why the situation with my cousin is so hard to swallow.


From my own experiences I think the parenting issues start at a young age. I honestly wonder if ppl aren't having kids for the wrong reasons. You know the whole societal time line thing: high school, college, get THE job, marriage, house, KIDS. There are quite a few ppl who have kids bc "it's time." How about you want them? How about you realize that children are a HUGE responsibility.. they take time and money. You have to interact WITH them, not talk to them or for them. Oh and they're not mini-adults. I know that part of growing is making mistakes. I also know that it's inevitable that others will be hurt when you make some of those mistakes, but being cruel just bc you can or you're maybe trying to prove a point (like you're a badass, oh yeah... you're a real badass telling your 67yr old Grandmother to go F herself... OOOOo) is highly uncalled for.

[MAB]

As my grandma' used to say "Let him cry, he doesnt cry blood, hes not going to die".



This made me laugh, in a good way. It reminded me of my 2yr olds. Parents don't realize how smart or manipulative their kids are at this age. We see them fall down on the playground and they will look at the nearest adult to see what the adult's reaction is. If the adult reacts in a manner of "OMG! Are you ok?! Poor baby!" the child instantly breaks into tears. If the adult calmly walks over, tells them to stand up, checks them for lacerations or blood, sees none and says, "you're ok, go play" they're fine and they go on their merry way. Even if the child is crying you can calmly ask them, "are you bleeding?" "No? Then you're fine." Give them a hug and they're good to go.

I see way too many toddlers play their parents hard core. Really makes you wonder sometimes...