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    Thread: My Chimera

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    1. 10-28-09, 11:27 am #181
      Gambit
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      The End is Where We Begin

      Had a dream last night that I was standing in a dark tunnel. The kind of tunnel one sees in shitty zombie movies. With dark, wet concrete in a semi-circle above me, faint light from incandescent bulbs hanging above me, I could see the damp blacktop below my feet. As I looked around me, I noticed that the ground was moving, pushing me like a conveyor belt towards the open end of the tunnel; into the light.

      I could see a figure standing in the opening, obstructing the light. As the ground below me crept closer, I could see the hooded figure, waiting with open arms. I turned around and tried my hardest to run back into the the tunnel, but to no avail. The harder I tried to run away from death, the more tired and beaten I felt. I fell to my knees and wondered why this was happening to me.

      And then it hit me. I stood up and held my head high. I turned around and grinned at the hooded figure at the end of the tunnel. Somewhere deep down I finally figured it all out...

      The sooner we accept our mortality, the sooner we can embrace our vitality.
      Do Not Go Gentle - Shuffled Cards - My Redemption - My Chimera - My Thoughts
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    2. 11-16-09, 5:31 pm #182
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      Some great stuff in here!!! Can't wait to read more!!!
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    3. 11-16-09, 6:40 pm #183
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      Drift Away

      I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. I opened them… I was reclined in a chaise lounge looking out on the waves. My feet were lying in the sand and a glass of lemonade perspired in my hand. The sun was beating down on me and I tasted the cold glass against my lips. I sat the drink down, closed my eyes, and took a deep breath.

      When I opened them, I was back to reality. I was thirty-six minutes into a forty-five minute session on the bike. I was looking through sweaty eyes and wiping my brow just about every minute. My tattered tee shirt was soaked through with my sweat, and my hooded sweatshirt was heavy with my perspiration. I looked up to the ceiling fan that wasn’t running, even although it was about ninety-six degrees in the gym. I had dozens of people in the gym giving me looks like I was too intense during my session. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

      I opened my eyes. I was sitting in my apartment, staring at my laptop and a blank Word file. My school books are piled up beside me and Bach’s Suite No.1 Prelude in G Major blasted from my ipod. I looked longingly towards my comfy chair and my xbox controller, wishing I could just skip what I knew I needed to finish. I reached for my sugar-free Red Bull, upset to find it empty before I break the top on a new can. I locked my fingers together and cracked my knuckles. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

      When I close my eyes, I’m holding my cell phone in a dark room, staring at the screen. A new friend, a very special person, had just told me that everything had been a lie. I had been being used to hurt another person and I was completely oblivious. I felt like that text message had stuck a knife into my lungs and the slow, painful escaping air was the most unbearable pain that I could ever feel. All I could do is close my eyes and take a deep breath.

      My eyes open as the bike begins beeping frantically. I had ridden for over fifty-six minutes. The deep stink of sweat pierced my nose and stung my eyes. I stood up slowly, unsure of the power left in my legs. But I stood up and didn’t wobble. I walked towards the exit and took a sharp breath when the cold air penetrated my lungs. I pulled my hood up as I walked towards my truck, towards the rest of the world. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath…
      Do Not Go Gentle - Shuffled Cards - My Redemption - My Chimera - My Thoughts
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    4. 11-16-09, 7:03 pm #184
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      whuf!

      That's a powerful series of images and feelings. Makes one wonder where you really were. <grin>

      I'm afraid it -sounds- like the moment with the cellphone and the text was one of the "real" moments involved.
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    5. 11-16-09, 7:13 pm #185
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      Quote Originally Posted by Firedrake Check Out Post
      whuf!

      That's a powerful series of images and feelings. Makes one wonder where you really were. <grin>

      I'm afraid it -sounds- like the moment with the cellphone and the text was one of the "real" moments involved.
      I have to admit... That was my impression, as well...
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    6. 11-16-09, 9:49 pm #186
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      Quote Originally Posted by Firedrake Check Out Post
      whuf!

      That's a powerful series of images and feelings. Makes one wonder where you really were. <grin>

      I'm afraid it -sounds- like the moment with the cellphone and the text was one of the "real" moments involved.
      Quote Originally Posted by Mr. Dead Check Out Post
      I have to admit... That was my impression, as well...
      I just want everyone to remember the power and necessity of personal reflection. Always take the time to remember why you are where you are and what it took to get there. And never lose track of where you are headed...
      Do Not Go Gentle - Shuffled Cards - My Redemption - My Chimera - My Thoughts
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    7. 12-12-09, 4:55 am #187
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    8. 12-17-09, 1:13 pm #188
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      Word. Real talk
      'The difference between a successful person and others is not a lack of strength, not a lack of knowledge, but rather a lack in will'

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    9. 12-17-09, 1:44 pm #189
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      Quote Originally Posted by Gambit Check Out Post
      I just want everyone to remember the power and necessity of personal reflection. Always take the time to remember why you are where you are and what it took to get there. And never lose track of where you are headed...
      well said G
      "This place, this darkness... There’s no better place to be." – Wrath


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    10. 01-23-10, 10:51 pm #190
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      "The Quitter" - Robert Service

      Read this, print it out, and read it every goddamn day. Then read it again.

      "When you're lost in the Wild, and you're scared as a child,
      And Death looks you bang in the eye,
      And you're sore as a boil, it's according to Hoyle
      To cock your revolver and . . . die.
      But the Code of a Man says: "Fight all you can,"
      And self-dissolution is barred.
      In hunger and woe, oh, it's easy to blow . . .
      It's the hell-served-for-breakfast that's hard.

      "You're sick of the game!" Well, now, that's a shame.
      You're young and you're brave and you're bright.
      "You've had a raw deal!" I know -- but don't squeal,
      Buck up, do your damnedest, and fight.
      It's the plugging away that will win you the day,
      So don't be a piker, old pard!
      Just draw on your grit; it's so easy to quit:
      It's the keeping-your-chin-up that's hard.

      It's easy to cry that you're beaten -- and die;
      It's easy to crawfish and crawl;
      But to fight and to fight when hope's out of sight --
      Why, that's the best game of them all!
      And though you come out of each gruelling bout,
      All broken and beaten and scarred,
      Just have one more try -- it's dead easy to die,
      It's the keeping-on-living that's hard."
      Do Not Go Gentle - Shuffled Cards - My Redemption - My Chimera - My Thoughts
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    11. 07-15-10, 12:18 am #191
      Gambit
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      No one is innocent in this.
      Do Not Go Gentle - Shuffled Cards - My Redemption - My Chimera - My Thoughts
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    12. 07-15-10, 8:05 am #192
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      some powerful stuff there G...thanks for posting that.
      "This place, this darkness... There’s no better place to be." – Wrath


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    13. 07-15-10, 12:42 pm #193
      Gambit
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      Isn't it funny the way it is when we know how it should be?


      We bitch about slow drivers even though they are actually going the speed limit. We dine out while we know someone is going hungry. We laugh while children somewhere are crying. The hottest song on the radio was written after the songwriter got her heart broken. It's considered artistic to paint an entire canvas blue.


      It's funny because we all do this. And I'm not saying it's a bad thing or preaching, but the thing is, we have to consciously think about the bad and not the good.

      Don't become negative, but just time some time today to remember how lucky we really are to have the choice between something as simple as 1% and 2% milk, I implore you.
      Do Not Go Gentle - Shuffled Cards - My Redemption - My Chimera - My Thoughts
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    14. 02-24-11, 2:07 pm #194
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      Quote Originally Posted by Gambit Check Out Post
      Isn't it funny the way it is when we know how it should be?


      We bitch about slow drivers even though they are actually going the speed limit. We dine out while we know someone is going hungry. We laugh while children somewhere are crying. The hottest song on the radio was written after the songwriter got her heart broken. It's considered artistic to paint an entire canvas blue.


      It's funny because we all do this. And I'm not saying it's a bad thing or preaching, but the thing is, we have to consciously think about the bad and not the good.

      Don't become negative, but just time some time today to remember how lucky we really are to have the choice between something as simple as 1% and 2% milk, I implore you.

      Where have you gone?
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    15. 06-24-11, 1:18 pm #195
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      Shadow on the Wall


      He stood there, in thunderstorms and in sunshine
      hidden in an alcove away from the beat cops.

      Against cracked plywood boarding up an abandoned disco
      where no one had entered in at least fifteen years.

      He stood there, in stark contrast to the faded particle board,
      the man in full black clothes and a pair of black wings.

      I wondered how long he had been standing watch of the passersby
      and exactly who spray-painted him into existence.

      Why does the message stick in my brain?
      Why worry when that shadow figure in London is always there?

      He gives me the hope that one day I can explain why:
      “This revolution is for display purposes only.”
      Do Not Go Gentle - Shuffled Cards - My Redemption - My Chimera - My Thoughts
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    16. 03-23-12, 5:10 pm #196
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      BUMP

      Where are you homie.
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    17. 04-02-15, 8:16 pm #197
      Gambit
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      If you're only killing time, it'll kill you right back
      Do Not Go Gentle - Shuffled Cards - My Redemption - My Chimera - My Thoughts
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    18. 04-02-18, 11:04 pm #198
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      Goddamn. I never thought I'd come back to this place, this haven for the like minded.

      Where do I start? How can I start? I feel like old guard and a newb all at the same time.

      Fuck that.

      Times change, people change. Circumstances change. I am so different from my last posts!

      I have a beautiful son! Holy crap!

      I'm still in the Glass City. My town is Toledo. I love it here.

      Umm, there's so much more I can and will start to explain.

      Let me just leave you with this...

      I am Gambit. I will always call your bluff
      Do Not Go Gentle - Shuffled Cards - My Redemption - My Chimera - My Thoughts
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