Besides flipping through photos, watching videos, listening to others and their sacrifices what is it, in you, that pushes you to move forward with this difficult task? Not how the other lifters execute and overcome, but you yourself? What do you do when those waves of quitting, doubting yourself, and the whole grandiose of pessimism arrive? We can listen to one another and our suggestions but in the end its us within to move continue forward. We voluntarily participate in an incredible life style that unfortunately doesn't allow any mistakes. Maybe its just me but I feel alone in this madness because I look around and I'm the only one who drags my food in a huge lunchbox and liters of water with me. I’m the only one I see who never intoxicates myself with bullshit and parties every weekend. To paraphrase Wycked’s article named "Mental Stress and Bodybuilding" we should divide ourselves from those things that will prohibit us from attaining our goals. Besides lifting, in my life I've been through hell and its obvious the way I lift with anger sometimes. Depression plays the biggest role in my life and its hard to cut that out when it becomes psychological and affects your day to day basis of consuming nutrients. One week and I’ll be staked with 3000 calories that need to be eaten and the next weeks I’ll consume 1200 calories and not give a shit about anything. I fight a vicious cycle within me everyday and I myself am the only opponent that stops me from being what I want to be. I’ve been browsing the F O R V M for months and months and I feel that its time to join because I know not just in the bodybuilding aspect but the aspect of life there has to be some response where I can build upon. The name is Francesco by the way…what’s good..